Open mouth insert foot...something we all hear every so often, some more than others, lol.
This is about not talking and actually listening. Not allowing my mind to wander on to the many other things. Focusing on whta really matters. What my husband wants to share with me. Seriously, holy crap I sound like a cornball, but its true Over time we all lose our ability to listen effectively, in some form, but I let it run everything else. Something comes to mind, it has to come out before I get to it.
I watched the Dr. Oz show about a month ago....Women using Adderall to lose weight. I'm a chronic dieter and watch my weight go up and down more than the roller coasters at Six Flags. SO I wondered about what makes a woman fake an actual disorder to get the drug...But then it moved into real problems for women with Adult ADD (not to be confused with ADHD, I'm def not hyperactive)... Story of my life.
Symptons
Flighty, forgetful, inability to focus, in ablitiy to listen , open mouth insert foot syndrome, memory loss, I could go on, but this woke me up. Hmmmm... could everything I and everyone I know, look at the aspects of me and thought incorrectly that these things were just personality quirks. So I took to the internet...Reader be ware of course, I must have went through a dozen of the self assessments for ADD...Every one, EVERY ONE, said go see your health care provider ASAP. You've got to be kidding me. So I talked to David and my parents and David said it was worth an appointment. My parents gave me more ammunition. I had been like this even when I was a kid, when no one even heard of ADD/ADHD. Could this be the key to a turning point?
Absolutely. I've been on it 30 days now and at the smallest dosage I did see a difference. It was like having clarity for the first time. The fog was lifting. I felt calmer, less anxious, less "moving in 20 directions", it was weird...but while it was a big difference what I was feeling inside, it was only minorly reflecting on the outside. David noticed a bit but there were still some lingering symptoms. SO on my 30 day checkup we decided to double the dosage. Even in day 2 of it I still notice more of a difference. This feeling of content is amazing. I don't panic at the thought of too many things to do, I don't procrastinate. I'm doing better...who knew
Now I'm not recommending this as a resource for everyone...it was just that light bulb moment for me. It hasn't changed me fundamentally I'm still the same dizzy girl at times and I'm still active and moving, just with better direction and focus. I know for some they say it takes away the personality. Check the damn dosage...too much yeah I can def see that happening, but lower it and it can be helpful. Really.
Which bring me back to listening. I"m a better listener now, I'm working hard to keep quiet too. Its not that he or anyone else wants a solution, they just want to be heard. Keeping my mouth shut! Avoid interruptions, don't be too nosy, don't invade that bubble! Which means give him space and he'll come to you...sounds simple enough. But for the controlling person that may be hard.
"The first duty of love is to listen." Paul Tillich
The next topic is sex...lmao. That's for another day. Lots to say there!! LMAO.
But the other one today is day 4- Love is thoughtful. Listening and not controlling, doing things for them just because you can. Ok and the dare is to at some point for no reason ask your spouse if you can do something for them or if they need anything.
That I can do. Seems pretty easy..wonder how that will work with him in another state?
ok off to do the dishes..may be back.
Update:
Forgot, to mention, he called me babe today, didn't use my name. We even talked and joked yesterday. He was flirty and fun. There is hope...
This is about not talking and actually listening. Not allowing my mind to wander on to the many other things. Focusing on whta really matters. What my husband wants to share with me. Seriously, holy crap I sound like a cornball, but its true Over time we all lose our ability to listen effectively, in some form, but I let it run everything else. Something comes to mind, it has to come out before I get to it.
I watched the Dr. Oz show about a month ago....Women using Adderall to lose weight. I'm a chronic dieter and watch my weight go up and down more than the roller coasters at Six Flags. SO I wondered about what makes a woman fake an actual disorder to get the drug...But then it moved into real problems for women with Adult ADD (not to be confused with ADHD, I'm def not hyperactive)... Story of my life.
Symptons
Flighty, forgetful, inability to focus, in ablitiy to listen , open mouth insert foot syndrome, memory loss, I could go on, but this woke me up. Hmmmm... could everything I and everyone I know, look at the aspects of me and thought incorrectly that these things were just personality quirks. So I took to the internet...Reader be ware of course, I must have went through a dozen of the self assessments for ADD...Every one, EVERY ONE, said go see your health care provider ASAP. You've got to be kidding me. So I talked to David and my parents and David said it was worth an appointment. My parents gave me more ammunition. I had been like this even when I was a kid, when no one even heard of ADD/ADHD. Could this be the key to a turning point?
Absolutely. I've been on it 30 days now and at the smallest dosage I did see a difference. It was like having clarity for the first time. The fog was lifting. I felt calmer, less anxious, less "moving in 20 directions", it was weird...but while it was a big difference what I was feeling inside, it was only minorly reflecting on the outside. David noticed a bit but there were still some lingering symptoms. SO on my 30 day checkup we decided to double the dosage. Even in day 2 of it I still notice more of a difference. This feeling of content is amazing. I don't panic at the thought of too many things to do, I don't procrastinate. I'm doing better...who knew
Now I'm not recommending this as a resource for everyone...it was just that light bulb moment for me. It hasn't changed me fundamentally I'm still the same dizzy girl at times and I'm still active and moving, just with better direction and focus. I know for some they say it takes away the personality. Check the damn dosage...too much yeah I can def see that happening, but lower it and it can be helpful. Really.
Which bring me back to listening. I"m a better listener now, I'm working hard to keep quiet too. Its not that he or anyone else wants a solution, they just want to be heard. Keeping my mouth shut! Avoid interruptions, don't be too nosy, don't invade that bubble! Which means give him space and he'll come to you...sounds simple enough. But for the controlling person that may be hard.
"The first duty of love is to listen." Paul Tillich
The next topic is sex...lmao. That's for another day. Lots to say there!! LMAO.
But the other one today is day 4- Love is thoughtful. Listening and not controlling, doing things for them just because you can. Ok and the dare is to at some point for no reason ask your spouse if you can do something for them or if they need anything.
That I can do. Seems pretty easy..wonder how that will work with him in another state?
ok off to do the dishes..may be back.
Update:
Forgot, to mention, he called me babe today, didn't use my name. We even talked and joked yesterday. He was flirty and fun. There is hope...
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